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Sigh.

I normally don’t post about the negative but this is a fair representaton of why Armageddon in Oz and Auckland are so hard on me.

These are the shows I get to hear rumours about myself. And some of them are doozies. It is partly why I have opened up my twitter and tumblr accounts and why I have so much of my progress online. If I don’t have it visible it is because I’m learning a new technique. I’m actually pretty darn shy inside, so I find “wow amazing” posts when I’m still learning a tad embarassing as I keep thinking of what can go wrong next 😉

I find being open on various social media keeps me accountable and non ranty about the nasty stuff. So the following is not a counter attack. They are answers to questions I can’t reply to directly due to emotions involved. Usually not mine. Sometimes mine.

Sexy costumes win because they are sexy.

This is about girls right? I know I don’t flaunt my own sexuality out there but I am hetero female, an uber costume geek and not at all swayed by anything other than my “oooh tiny stitches/paaaaaiiiiiint details/how the heck did you do that” related synapses.

Sadly apparently the opposite has been said, that I am jealous and bitter. There is always a reason and it is never true. Nothing but a balance of skills/performance (cos-play two equal halves). If you believe it should have swung a different way, I understand. If you malign my reputation and put down others in doing so I really do not.

Is her [my] vac sealed (sic) costume as good as…

Firstly that would be vacformed (or vacuum formed or vac. formed) And no it was not. If you do not believe me you can come to my workroom and stamp of the floor if you like; I’ll be at the other end of the driveway in full coveralls, dust mask and goggles because I know what sanded s*&^ is in there.

I’ll lock the door after you are gone and wait a week for the dust to settle before trying to use my vacuum cleaner.

I generally make everything I wear except for shoe bases and I do occasionally buy a wig that needs minimal styling**. Shae was coloured by me and Mina had a trim (I’d liked to have gotten a razor to make the ends smoother but the only here is a professional set…) and was carefully sewn into the half up do. It’s a good wig so the back was on lace and didn’t like horizontal parts.)

Heck I even paint myself!!! That is something you should delegate but knowing how long it takes I am not asking someone to do that when the attention is on the wearer. So I worked out my brushes and paints and cleaner and painted up once in the morning and that was that.

I feel bad as I have recommended PAX but forgot to mention IM to clean it off…. a few people have since said “It was amazing!!! Stayed on all day!! but it took three of us to scrub one person clean.”

Isopropyl Myristate. I have a lovely gift from when I was in Wellington last. Idon’t know when Ill need it next but it is stored with my baby wipes and other hepful stuff. It does make it much easier. Slather on, wait, face wipe off.

Her Slave Leia was bought

Sad Panda face. This was the costume that started the allergy so not only did I ruin my health further but all that work was attibuted elsewhere. There are some beautiful kits out there but mine looks nothing like any of them. I fought my instincts to make it pretty like one of the kits and put in all those stupid “bubbles” and corrosion and perfectly smooth lines. I would do a side by side by side comparison but I will not post photos I don’t have any rights to. Pretty obvious when you start to do that though 🙂

Her Slave Leia was papier mache

Okay, so there are some great costumes that are. but this was not. I understand a bit- after all when you see someone in that costume your eyes are either darting back and forth so as not to leer or you are leering. At least with this one I know there was no leering.

All she knows is Star Wars

“I deserve neither such praise nor such censure” as Lizzy would say. Like all my fandoms I focus on areas where I feel a sense of inclusion and that are of interest so I can talk about aliens or Leia being a really good spy (but all of Jabba’s court would have had to be stupid*) or about TOR and a little about Legacy. But it’s not all I know and though Sci-fi, musicals and classic novels are my first loves they are not the be all and end all. And I certainly cringe at some musicals and at some classic novels.

That costume was inappropriate for a 15 year old

Um what? This one was when I wore Satine in 2004. I was 28 and toned down the song a fair bit.

This one was interesting as it reached the upper levels of the Aotea Centre before I did! Someone though did send a letter to Bill and Adele and Zeb calling me a slut. Yay?

The next year I was apparently “banned” and another letter was sent. Sigh.

And I won’t go into the assumptions made about any and all women in costume. Unless you are a Tusken Raier Female you are there for sexual advances- and you will be ridiculed for doing so no matter if you are seen as being approved or not aproved of. Trust me on this. Seen beautiful women in amazing costumes torn down for being beautiful. And by men, so don’t think it is just a female jealousy thing.

But yeah, I am aware in the back of my mind those kinds of judgments are made and depending on who i either get the thumbs up (sexy) or thumbs down (never wear that costume again). This is not I repeat not my primary reason for wearing costumes. Problem is this is such an ingrained belief especially in the Comic and Sc-fi fandoms that it can affect later decisions.

I am terrified of getting into costume, any costume aside from my historical gear becase of the above issues. I do it not because I think I am sexy but in the hopes there will be a fellow costume geek i can run in to and can discuss what makes the costume so cool.

I am pleased to say I have yet to be disapppointed in this regard 🙂 There is always at least one other like minded person.

All this is just to illustrate that I push through all that because of the personal rewards in making and wearing what I do and the rewards of seeing the growth in contestants year after year. They make up for it.

** I say generally as though I can’t think of anything currently on the blog or my website that had bought componants…. I did have help on some armour I no longer wear (I am about to try for the armour I wanted, but didn’t have a rotary tool for at the time…. oooooh ideas…

*What we learn in the first few scenes wth Leia is she is mouthy. Even in the face of toruture. If she was really “caught” in RotJ she’d have shouted the place down, there would be a few black eyes and she would have killed Jabba sooner. The whole plan though would have gone to ruin. han wouldn’t have been put in the same cell as Chewie, Lando would have had to somehow get out of being a guard, not sure it’s an opt out position, and the droids probably would not have been accepted as gifts but probably recyled.

So no, the costume is not a celebration of slavery it’s a celebration of a woman who went against all her natural instincts and was part of a team that rescued Han. And took down Jabba in the process.